Who’s Showing Us How? The Quiet Crisis of Role Models and the Rise of Real Ones
It’s never been easier to find someone to follow. A scroll through Instagram, TikTok or YouTube offers a flood of lifestyle influencers, self-help gurus, and ‘day-in-the-life’ videos with curated morning routines and aesthetic affirmations.
But what happens when the people we follow aren’t really leading us anywhere?
What young people are craving isn’t more content, it’s role models. Not perfect people, but real people. Not icons, but anchors. And as society becomes noisier, faster, and more performative, the quiet crisis isn’t that we lack information, it’s that we lack inspiration we can trust.
Where Did All the Role Models Go?
Historically, role models were people we knew. A teacher who noticed you. A parent who showed up, even if they didn’t say much. A coach, a neighbour, a mentor. But now, many young people grow up without those steady figures nearby, and are left to piece together guidance from viral videos and algorithm-fed advice.
This isn’t about blaming influencers. It’s about recognising a cultural shift, and the emotional gaps it leaves behind.
At thinkWell, we hear these gaps in the sessions we hold. People say things like:
• “I don’t know how to be an adult. No one ever showed me.”
• “I feel like I’m making this up as I go along.”
• “I can’t tell if I’m failing or just figuring it out.”
The world is demanding a lot from young people. But who’s showing them how?
Leadership Isn’t Loud
You don’t need a million followers to be a role model. You just need to be present, consistent, and human. That’s what real leadership looks like, and it’s what young people are starving for.
In our “Tap In” work with teams and organisations, we help leaders step into this space with authenticity. We support them to:
• Listen without defensiveness
• Model emotional regulation
• Show what it means to change your mind
• Apologise and repair
• Honour values, not just metrics
These may sound simple, but in a corporate culture that still celebrates stoicism and suppresses vulnerability, they are radical acts.
Internal Role Models: Building from the Inside
But external leaders aren’t the whole story. Through coaching, counselling, and hypnotherapy, thinkWell helps clients discover internal role models, versions of themselves that are calm, grounded, wise, and capable.
This might be:
• A guided hypnotherapy session where a client meets their future self
• A coaching conversation that reframes doubt into decision-making
• A counselling journey that rewrites the story of “not good enough”
When someone begins to internalise a voice of compassion, clarity, and curiosity, they no longer look outside for every answer. They start to lead themselves.
The Power of “Being Who You Needed”
There’s a quote by Ayesha Siddiqi that echoes deeply in our work:
“Be who you needed when you were younger.”
That’s what we strive for. Whether we’re working with a 20-year-old navigating their first job, or a 35-year-old unpacking childhood messages about success, our goal is not to impress or instruct, but to model presence. To offer a relationship that feels safe, honest, and sturdy enough to build from.
And over time, our clients start to offer that same presence to themselves, and others.
Rewriting the Role Model Story
Being a role model doesn’t mean having it all figured out. It means showing what it looks like to keep showing up.
It’s the friend who says, “Me too.”
The colleague who gives you grace when you mess up.
The therapist who says, “Let’s explore that together.”
The leader who admits, “I don’t know, but I’m learning.”
thinkWell exists to support those people, and to help others become them.
Because in a world full of noise, real leadership is quiet. And powerful.
